The Daily Procrastinator

This is part 5 of a series of posts looking back at the Marvel/Epic Comics title “The Alien Legion.”

After a 20 issue first volume of The Alien Legion, the editors at Epic decided it was time for a change of the status quo for Nomad Squadron and made the call to reboot the series. Their first move? Getting rid of that pesky “The” in the title:

The powers that be wanted to streamline the series a bit, emphasizing fewer characters and providing “grittier” storylines, which meant that the environmental and other social cause subplots would disappear with more of an emphasis on violent conflict. New blood (Chuck Dixon) was also brought in to help script/plot the series, though Potts would remain on staff.

The series actually opens two years after the original series ended, where we find (now) Major Sarigar leading a new squadron into battle. What happened to Nomad, you ask? Apparently it was a mission gone bad, with all the legionnaires lost on a hostile planet on which they had been dropped, as usual, ill-prepared for what they’d find:

For the past two years, then, Sarigar has been haunted by his perceived failure and the loss of his best team. He apparently has also continually requested the opportunity to go back to Hellscape to try to find either survivors…or remains, though to no avail.

The last straw for Sarigar comes in a bar where a few legionnaires openly mock him for the loss of Nomad and declaring him a coward. He resigns his position in the Legion (then beats the HELL out of said soldiers), and makes an oath to himself to discover the fate of Nomad. Through some nice detective work, and the financial backing of his former lieutenant’s father (Torie Montroc), Sarigar learns that some members of Nomad might still be alive, and so he returns to the planet in search of answers.

Through the aid of a Quaalian prisoner, Sarigar is able to locate Jugger Grimrod and Torie first. Jugger’s pretty much unchanged, though Torie, as the first volume’s noble, at times too trusting lieutenant is now a withdrawn and blunt hardcase. Two years of being in hiding with Jugger does that to a man. So is seeing two of your legionnaires tortured and eaten by scavengers. Torqa Dun and Durge didn’t survive the planet, or, more directly, the reboot of the title:

Rounding out the survivors would be Meico, the four-armed telepathic medic; Tamara, the late addition to Nomad discussed last time; and Zeerod, a wolf-like humanoid who lost his legs on the planet. The reunion is an awkward one, though that wears off quickly as the Quaalians mount an attack on the squad allowing the troops to take out their frustrations in an appropriately violent fashion. Sarigar marvels at the changes in his former squadron, but nonetheless decides that the best thing for them is to reform as Nomad Squadron.

After some impassioned appeals and some called-in favors, Sarigar has his wish granted and Nomad is recreated as a strike force. But first, he’ll have to recruit some more legionnaires…

Next week: the new members of Nomad and Jugger gets promoted (really!)

This is part 4 of a series of posts looking back at the Marvel/Epic Comics title “The Alien Legion.”

The end of volume one of The Alien Legion would come with the publication of issue 20, much to the surprise of readers.  No warning had been given in the pages of the comic that the series would end, and the letters pages continued to respond to fans’ ideas and praise as if the writers had no end in sight for Nomad Squadron.  Epic had even seen the publication of Alien Legion’s first graphic novel.

Of course, this was the mid-80s, long before the internet would come along and allow comics readers to know about upcoming titles, plot lines, and cancellations.  We were tougher back then, not as spoiled as today’s comic readers – and we all walked three miles uphill in the snow each week for our pull lists – so we were able to blithely read each issue, always sure that we’d see more of Jugger and Sarigar next month.

Perhaps fans should have seen the cancellation coming, though. The last few issues of volume one, admittedly, fell into a bit of a rut, as Nomad Squadron would land on a planet, face a hostile indigenous race, blast the hell out of them because they had no other options, and in the process lose an occasional legionnaire here or there.

It was during this last stretch that the writers would finally introduce female legionnaires, too.  There had been many letters questioning the lack of females in the Legion (and also many saying “keep ‘em out”), and by the time issue 16 came around Nomad Squadron  and readers were introduced to Tamara, a new recruit who is easy on the eyes, but hard on the jaw:

It was, in my opinion, a testament to the writers that they took fan input seriously.  I don’t know that today’s Marvel or DC would adjust their story lines as significantly (hell, even at all) as Epic did, and not make it a patronizing gesture.  Far from it – Tamara would be put through her paces through the next four issues, holding her own and then some when compared with regulars Jugger, Torqa Dun, and Zeerod.  Still, the change in the status quo (and the scenery) wasn’t quite enough to keep The Alien Legion going, and, after a twentieth issue that saw the members of Nomad Squadron forced to hunt one of their own for desertion, with an unsettling conclusion, the letters page closed out with a brief note that surely stunned readers:

The shock wore off quickly, though, as those madcaps at Epic had included another box just below that one:

And so the loyal readers were promised a new Alien Legion series, featuring some familiar faces, and even more new ones, and, as they say, an all new format.   But how would this second volume compare with the first?  Come back next Thursday to find out…

Greetings, procrastinators! As you may have noticed, there was no Weekly Wrap-Up last week. Frankly, I procrastinated. I consider it my duty to let procrastination interfere with my work every now and again. Practicing what I preach, you know… Anyway, the past two weeks on The Daily Procrastinator have been as fruitful as ever, and this is your chance to make sure you didn’t miss a word of TDP’s enlightening content. Let’s consider one subject at a time.

Food: The first tasty post of the week came from BigRedPoet, who considered it his duty to make the world (or at least the world of procrastinators) aware of the glory of Squeez Bacon. Even though Magnus rained on the parade in comments, Squeez Bacon is still a great idea. TallGirl, no doubt inspired by the tantalizing possibility of a meat condiment, continued the bacon orgy with a celebration of the myocardial-infarction-inducing dish known as the Bacon Explosion. Imagine it topped with Squeez Bacon, if you dare.

Entertainment: On April 27, BigRedPoet posted a review/celebration of Led Zeppelin’s historic 1969 show in San Francisco, complete with a FANTASTIC photograph of the young Zeps doing their thing on stage. A few days later, FlashCap (he lives!) bemoaned the disparity between the comic book characters readers have come to know and love and the characters who appear on-screen in recent Marvel movies.

Technology: Magnus, assisted by a mysterious figure known only as Z, posted a list of quick-fixes and tweaks that will whip your PC into tip-top Springtime condition. I’ve used several of them already, with fantastic results. In a completely different branch of technology, BigRedPoet examined the difference between “awesome” and “lame,” as applied to three-wheeled transportation.

This picture requires no explanation. Not THIS week...

Current Events: TallGirl piped up as the voice of reason in the face of the swine-flu inspired hysteria that’s literally dominating the television and radio waves this week. I prefer TallGirl’s point of view over the popular panic. Note the irony of two bacon-inspired posts in the days preceding the swine flu outbreak.

This Crazy Life: TDP’s resident social commentator, TallGirl, weighed in on several topics in the past two weeks. She started with cosmetic surgery in suburbia. Later, she pondered the proper ratio of cream to coffee…or is that the ratio of coffee to cream? Finally, she revealed how people’s perceptions of a friend or neighbor can change simply through the revelation of a pair of enticing underpants.

Visit The Daily Procrastinator at any of the links above and sign up to receive daily email updates so you never miss an article!

The Daily Procrastinator: Contributing to the Dramatic Reduction of Your Personal Productivity

May 1st is going to disappoint a lot of Wolverine fans. It’s going to enrage a lot of every single Deadpool fan. Gambit and Emma Frost fans are going to feel slighted. Hell, the three Blob super-fans out there are going to have to commiserate over a bucket of fried chicken skins after seeing Wolverine: Origins. To a Marvel comic book reader, the movie is that bad.

To non-comic book readers, the movie might be a mindless, action-filled romp, which is apparently all Fox wanted this movie to be. To fans of the comic book characters, the movie will be yet another example of why Fox should keep their hands off of Marvel properties.

Think about it. The most successful comic book movies have been films that, above all, stay true to the characters they are representing from the comic books. The Dark Knight takes enormous liberties with the details of how Bruce Wayne manages to be the caped crusader, but the movie never falters on the reasons why he does what he does. The first two Spider-Man films might diverge from the stories as presented in the comics, but they don’t infringe on who Peter Parker is, who Spider-Man has historically been (and even the third can only be faulted for how poorly the symbiote’s influence on Parker was portrayed). And the first two X-Men films, while not presenting the exact stories from the books, get the characters right.

Even with Storm's bad hair, you can still recognize each character

Look at the failed superhero movies: Daredevil, while not a complete bomb, tried to make the Man Without Fear into a Spider-Man/Batman hybrid. He’s not. It should be the simplest thing in the world to make a solid Punisher movie, but it hasn’t happened yet. Elektra might as well not have been about the Marvel character. The Fantastic Four films chose to go cheap on characterization, heavy on the campiness, and any sense of these characters beyond cartoons is never allowed. The casting wasn’t all that great, either (note: when re-booting, keep that guy who played Johnny Storm, can the rest – yes, including Jessica Alba – and make the Thing CGI).

Shouldn't The Thing look more physically imposing?

Wolverine: Origins commits the same damn mistake that those latter films do: it’s not true to the source material. Listen, I could care less how Ryan Reynolds character becomes Deadpool, so long as the figure called Deadpool is a mouthy killer who’s good with all kinds of weapons. He shouldn’t shoot Cyclops’ beams out of his eyes nor should swords the length of his arms come out of his forearms, AND HIS MOUTH SHOULDN’T BE SEWN SHUT! And it follows that if a prior film suggests that Wolverine has a dark past (you know, like X2 – and all of Marvel continuity – suggests), I’d expect to see some dark times rather than a character that is utterly heroic and noble throughout his entire life. As the tagline suggests, what Wolverine does isn’t very nice.

FOX studio's version of Deadpool - I'm not kidding.

I don’t think it’s any coincidence that the most successful comic books films remain true to the source material. There’s a reason these characters have remained popular with readers for decades, and when a studio disregards these qualities in favor of a chance to dazzle with some meaningless special effect, they are not creating a Wolverine movie, a Marvel movie, or a DC movie, but a _______ studio movie.

And that’s not what comic fans are paying to see.

This is NOT me.

I admit it – I’m over 30 and I collect comics. I’ve got six long boxes stored away in my closet packed with Marvel and DC comics dating back to when I started collecting in the early 80s. I quit my habit when I got to college, then restarted about five years ago when a student of mine gave me a copy of New Avengers #1. It was as if the gift had reawakened a long dormant addiction within me, and I was hooked again (Thanks, Chaz). I now make my weekly Wednesday run to the local comic book store to pick up my pull list, which varies from two to eight books a week (“books” – a euphemism of mine), and spend the evening after the kids are in bed reading about characters with names like Iron Man and Captain America saving the world.

Or beating the hell out of each other, as it were.

A grown man collecting comics is suspect, to say the least. Matt Groening’s “Comic Book Guy” often comes to mind, the comic-and sci-fi obsessed loser who wields his superhero knowledge like a weapon. And while I have seen fellow comic book geeks who fit the stereotype, it’s just not me. I’m married and have two daughters. I run half-marathons, I play sports. I have a rewarding career teaching college English. In other words, I’m an adult. But comic book collecting is often seen as a kid’s pursuit, to be outgrown before one hits puberty and moves on to more “adult” interests. And yet I still look forward to Wednesdays.

I guess I just don’t buy into the argument that superheroes are inherently childish. For as long as we’ve had stories to tell, we’ve had our superheroes. The Bible tells the story of Samson, the original strongman, the loss of his long locks his Kryptonite. The ancient Greeks had Heracles and Achilles, among many others. Beowulf, Robin Hood and King Arthur and his Knights of the Round Table are our early western heroes. All are stories still told and taught today, valued for what they tell us not just about ourselves but also for suggesting what we can become.

And so it is with today’s superheroes. They are today’s myths, tomorrow’s legends. Look at the organization of the Justice League, with its god-like heroes: Wonder Woman (Hera), Superman (Zeus), Batman (Hephaestus), The Flash (Hermes), Green Lantern (Apollo) and Aquaman (Poseidon). The Marvel heroes, however, are more human, often flawed in some way (Tony Stark is an alcoholic, Peter Parker is driven by guilt), just as Beowulf and King Arthur were, yet we still admire them.

Seriously, how cool is this?

There are certainly real heroes I can identify in my life, both intimately familiar (my parents) and anonymous (the 9/11 firefighters, e.g.), and all are a testament to the human capacity for love and sacrifice. Superheroes, while not real, exhibit these same qualities each week, and, for me, remind me that there is a potential for greatness in us all, despite an inability to lift 20 tons, turn invisible or fly. We just have to try.

Idealistic? Sure. But that’s why I still read comics books.