Living in Suburbia
All I know about cosmetic surgery I’ve learned from living in suburbia. And trust me, kids, it’s not always pretty.
Lesson #1: Botox is contagious. It spreads like wildfire among friends. Friends who no longer have the power of facial expressions.
Lesson #2: If you just get your eyes done, it only draws attention to how much the rest of your face is sagging.
Lesson #3: Sometimes bigger boobs don’t make you look younger or more vibrant, they just make you look top-heavy. And ridiculous. Especially when you’re chasing your kids around in anything that prominently features the “Juicy” or Victoria’s Secret “Pink” logos.
Lesson #4: I understand that lips get thinner as you age, but those collagen injections make you look like a duck. And not a young duck, either.
So ladies, please think twice before your next cosmetic procedure.
May 4th, 2009 at 11:26 am
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